Saturday, September 11, 2010

Lessons in Stress and Controversy

published in old blog May 24

I woke up, or rather, bolted up-right in bed, often after the high school newspaper was off to the printers, and whatever I had written and edited was struck in ink. Solid. Permanent. The regret burned like a hot brick sinking from my face, through my heart, landing in my stomach. Whether I was obsessing over a sentence I wished I could rewrite for clarity, or weighing every word (and its connotation) in an article I knew would be controversial, it was always something. Usually multiple somethings. I would lie in bed, seeing every word and sentence of my editorials pass in front of my eyes, suddenly worrying about the reaction of readers.

The two years I was the editor in chief of that monthly school paper, I thrived on the process of researching and writing my articles, loving every second of it—until the day it was published. Then it was almost noting but a cause for stress. I never learned how to get this under control in high school. Stress ate me up, and when I entered college, I wanted nothing to do with a career in journalism like I always thought I did. It took me two years preparing to be an English teacher before I changed my major again, leading eventually to an internship with a magazine.

It has been a number of years since I have been publishing, but oh so quickly did the reminder come as to why I’ve quit multiple times! A writer who publishes must have thick skin. We can nurse fantasies of being like Emily Dickinson, whose words were discovered after her death. It seems quite romantic, actually. But anyone wanting to make a profession of writing obviously needs to be read in her lifetime!
A profession or hobby in the field of communication simply puts oneself up for a lot of criticism. Few people in other professions have the general public criticizing their craft. Getting used to that criticism is simply a job requirement; you cannot make it go away. You cannot possibly avoid offending or upsetting people if you write with any conviction about anything. No matter what aspects of an issue you illuminate, someone will want you to have covered others. Whatever you report, there will be a group of people happy to hear you reflect something they already like, believe, etc., and a group that likewise already hates, disbelieves it, etc.

To survive as a writer, you have to learn how to put readers’ reactions in perspective and effectively deal with the stress inherent in publishing. You need to remember the purpose in your piece and not second-guess that based on everyone else’s comments. Do evaluate if criticism is warranted. Were you careless, unethical or unprepared? Is there something constructive in the criticism that can help you improve your craft? But if you know you did your research, presented it honestly, wrote well and addressed the issue appropriately for the size of the focus lens, you have to let go of the false guilt of simply not being able to write it in a way that satisfies everyone.

A particular difficulty of mine is criticism in the form of someone wanting me to have included more information or another viewpoint—especially when it is something I considered, but the scope of the piece was not a large enough platform to cover all angles. Sometimes as a writer, you will land projects that you could write a book on in the effort to present a completely balanced and thorough treatment of a subject. Remember you are only one writer, given the opportunity to write a mere piece; no one writer can be all things to all people, pleasing every one. Journalism isn’t about that.

As a journalist, realize controversy will court you. Whether you cover local PTO meetings and the local political machine nurses petty jealousies and factions try to sway your coverage, or you write investigative pieces for a national magazine. The job of the journalist is to educate and inform people of what they do not already know or believe. It is called “news” not “status-quo.” This aspect of writing applies even to fiction as fiction will often take on the role, at least in some readers’ eyes, as social commentary. Even if you stick to writing novels, what you write has the potential to upset people. Sometimes especially those close to you.

I’m reminded of how Jesus said a prophet is never accepted in his hometown, and learned the truth of this, as early as sixteen years old. Trying to illuminate things will invariably be seen as “stirring the pot” to some people. When your work as a writer exits in the daily lives of friends and family who live the consequences of your effort, things can get sticky. I recall a controversy in my school district on censorship in school English classes when I was in high school. The desire to censor some books was initiated by the parents who were friends of my parents. I was charged with handling the issue in an editorial. Despite trying my best to fairly present both sides, criticism came from both. Some words were spoken to my father from the man challenging the school board to censor the books, and it impacted my father’s business as that man had been a customer.

The fact that you have a voice and that it gets attention will always bother a portion of a community. And that does not go away when you publishing goes beyond the walls of high school; your community just gets larger, and the internet makes it global. When you get criticism from Milan and Shanghai, you know you’ve arrived.

Most people are and become writers because they have a need to express, teach or inform. Something from inside you loves soaking up all the information you can, hungry to learn new things—until they fill you up and you begin to look outward to find the audience that needs to learn it. Writing is a way to reach people, to complete the cycle you were created for. Even if you try to quit, you later realize it was merely a break. The compulsion to write and even publish again will return—because it’s your calling. And you will be drawn, continually, to the fringes of issues, to the minority opinions, to the controversial stances—because that is where there is something to learn, something testing the status quo of society, offering the checks and balances. We need to question what we are so comfortable with, unquestionably, because the worst problems arise when we all get comfortable and stop questioning.
I wrote this, with the exception of this paragraph, months ago, after I started publishing again, but I remembered this now because some things I will soon be publishing may very well be the most controversial subjects in my career yet. This is my reminder to myself to expect the criticism. If everyone just patted my back and praised my skill, I wouldn't be really informing anyone of anything. To do anything really important, anything that really helps people learn anything new, some people will feel their feathers ruffled. Some people just want to shoot the messenger. (And sometimes, I have to ask, God, why did you pick me to be a messenger?!)

So I dig into my faith and the God who gave me this mission, do yoga, and practice stress-relief techniques. This is part of the writing gig. Publishing is not for people-pleasers or the faint of heart.
My most controversial articles, to date (and yes, while I expected it with some, reaction to others was a surprise):
Chemical Imbalance Theory of Depression Incorrect; Antidepressants Ineffective
If an Antidepressant Works Due to The Placebo Effect, What is The Harm in That?
Problems Arise When Children are Pushed to Read Too Early

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